Chapter 10

    Memory. It’s a short and simple word. Its value and importance could be compared with our own personality and life. Our memory is what creates us, we learn from past experiences so our attitude and characteristics change because of those experiences. Our memory is what reminds us of who and what we love and hate. It reminds of our habits, what we do first thing in the morning, what we do in awkward situations, and how we cheer ourselves up when we’re sad. Our memory is what makes us who we are, so what if most of our memory just goes far behind in our brain that we can no longer remember any of it? That would be life changing wouldn’t it? Our will our memory just simply catch up with us as time goes by, and we’ll be the way we were before we lost it; as if nothing happened?

    “What? You suddenly can’t see now? It’s me!” Said one of the girls, trying her best to force a giggle out of her.

    At that moment the door swung open. An older lady, maybe in her twenties came rushing through the door, “Oh my God, Haman!” she cried out as she hugged me, but I pushed her away.

    I moved my knees closer to my chest, ready to jump off the bed and run away if those people tried to do anything more odd, “Who are you?” I repeated myself.

    The lady looked stunned at first, but then she moved back to the side of my bed. I tried moving off the bed, but I felt pain in my stomach, and the wires held my movement as well. The lady softened her facial expression, and talked to me in a gentle tone, “Abdulrahman, it’s me your sister, Maryam.” She got her phone out and showed me a picture of the two of us, “See, that’s a picture of the two of us a couple of months ago.” 

    I stared at the picture, without recognizing anything. However, right when I was about to direct my gaze back at Maryam, I felt like pictures and sounds were being thrown back in my head, “I remember that day, it was the day after my last semester exam. You took me out for lunch to celebrate, and then you dropped me off at some girls’ house.” I moved my head towards the girl who first talked to me, “It was you, right… Malak? You really changed since the last time I saw you.” Malak smiled at me, delighted that I remembered her.

    A few seconds later the doctor came in, followed by a nurse, and my dad. I was surprised not to see my mom here, but I figured that she’s probably just got stuck in traffic. The doctor did a few tests on me. He also asked me a few questions with the assistance of my dad and sister, so he could find out how much memory I have lost.

     “How old did you think you were when you woke up?” The doctor asked.

    “Eleven, but I guess not? Umm… where is my mom?” I asked looking at the door.

    “Abdulrahman…” My dad started, but the doctor cut him off.

    “She is going to a few clinics to get you the medicine you need.”

    At that moment my sister started heading for the door, so I asked her where she was going right before she left, “I have to go check on something…” she replied with a sick-sounding voice, and rushed out.

    The doctor then kept asking me a few questions. He said that I would have to stay here for a few days. The good news was that since I was able to recall a few memories, and remember my family members, I will hopefully regain all or most of the memory I have lost. However, the doctor mentioned that some of the things that just currently occurred in my life might take some time to remember because I haven’t thought of them enough. But the memories that have been in my head for a long should be easier to remember.

    The doctor also gave me a list of few exercises for my brain that could help me regain my memory. He said that doing puzzles, coloring and listening to music could help me remember. I was also given a few medications for my head and my stomach.

    When I was finally back home, the place looked a bit unfamiliar. A few of the furnitures were moved and replaced. My mother’s chair was no longer in its place, we had a wider TV, and my video game was no longer in my room (my sister said I broke it by accident).

    On the second day of being back home, I got impatient waiting for my mother to return from her trip, “When is she coming back? I really miss her.” I asked my dad.

    He sat down with me, looked me in the eyes and told me that she was dead. I didn’t believe it. I got angry at first. I started shouting and screaming. I ran up to my room, threw myself on the bed crying and I started hitting my head against the bed, wishing that I would forget what he just told me. I wished that I would forget everything all over again, without gaining my memory back. When my dad came in I yelled at him and ordered him to get out. After half an hour of crying, my dad came, without listening to a word I say and held me close.

    “Everything will be alright.” He whispered.

    “No, it wont!” I cried.

    “You managed to live with it once, and you will again. You know that, especially because you your mom won’t be happy to know that you’re upset.”

    Two weeks have passed by and I was still in disbelief, but at least I cried less. It was pointless for me to go back to school since I couldn’t remember anything, so I was homeschooled. I didn’t accept any of my friends to come visit me, but instead I spent most of my time with my dad and sister, trying to remember as much as possible and to try and catch up on all the work I have missed. It felt like something impossible to do, but now at least we had our spring break so I had less to catch up on. I was forced to meet all of my friends because the doctor said it will help me regain my memory faster, and he also said they could help me catch up on the past three or four years of school… somehow.

    Malak, Noor, and Talal were the first come visit me. Seeing them all grown up, with out me not remembering the days we spent growing up was hard. It also sucked that I couldn’t remember how I became close with Noor and Talal, so after the awkward talks I decided to just ask them.

    “Well,” Talal began, “we aren’t really close, I just came bowling with all of you once, but I had to check up on you.”

    “We on the other hand have been really close, so tell me how do you feel?” Noor asked sweetly.

    “I have been having a lot of headaches, and the need to stuff my mouth with food a lot, but the doctor said that the headaches should go in a couple of days… this talk was last week.” I said disappointedly.

    Noor and Malak gave each other quick, worried glances, but before I was able to ask them anything, Talal dropped an album and a few binders in front me, “We made this album for you. We put together all the pictures of you in the past three years to help you remember. And these binders are all of our best notes since grade six, to help you catch up easier. Don’t worry, you’re smart, and you’ve got us; you’ll hopefully remember everything soon.” He said excitedly.

    A lot of people came by, and I actually recognized some of them, especially my relatives, and all the adults. The visits did help a little. I managed to remember what I loved to do with some of the people. I learned that I have been doing very well at school, and also that I had new hobbies like running, cooking, reading. I also met someone new, Manal, she was a bit disappointed when I couldn’t remember her, because she said that we started becoming really good friends before I was sent to the hospital.

    After everybody left, I finally had the chance to ask Malak a few questions. My father and her parents trusted the two of us, and both knew that I really needed her right now to recover my memory, so her parents let her sleepover in our guest room. My father was already asleep, while my sister was too busy on the computer, doing some research. Malak and I went into the living room. She came with the album again so we can go over it, in hope that I would remember more this time.

    “Why didn’t Fahad and Faisal come?” I asked her when she placed the album in front of me.

    She looked a bit frightened by this question. After she thought of what to say she told me, “You guys just slipped apart…”

    “Then I went to call them, there has to be a reason why that happened, we were really good friends.” I demanded.

    “Haman, no.” She readjusted herself on the couch, stalling to find an answer, “They were a very bad influence on you, so you guys stopped being friends.”

    “What are you talking about?”

    “They smoke, and steal, so we decided to get as far away from them as possible.

    I jumped off my seat from the shock, “What? How could you say that about them!”

    “Abdulrahman, sit down, and listen. Did I ever lie to you? If they were really your friends, then why didn’t they come today?”

    “They might come tomorrow…”

    “Haman, believe me when I say it’s it's for the best; and you know it. Don’t worry, you’ll remember everything soon, and you will believe me, but for now, tell me, do you trust me?”

    I smiled, “You don’t have to ask me this question to know that I do.”

    “Then try your best to stay away from them alright?” She whispered softly.

    I nodded. “I’ve got another question, what happened to me?”

    Her eyes grew wide, but then she giggled, “What you cant remember that either? You lost some of your memory.”

    “Malak, you know what I mean.” I said duly.

    She paused for a couple of seconds, “You tell me, because I wasn’t there. Can’t you remember? Think hard.”

    I closed my eyes, pressed hard on my brain, beginning it to give me some answers, and I got it, “I remember falling and hitting my head on the ground.”

    “How did you fall?” she asked. Her eyes were begging me to remember.

    I brought back the memory of my head slamming onto the ground, and tried to rewind even further, but I couldn’t. I squeezed on my head, wishing that I’d remember.

    “Hey, it’s alright, you’ve remember plenty of stuff today, that small part hopefully won’t matter.” She tried covering her worried expression by smiling, but I saw it clearly, and couldn’t help but wonder what is she not telling me? What could be so horrible that she would hide it from me?